Koinophobia - the fear of being normal. Why be scared of being average?
I want to begin exploring this idea with what I believe “normal” means. Of course, this definition is always in flux when looking at the centuries; it is never stagnant, and every century, or perhaps every 50 years at the rate the world is moving at now, is a different epoch characterized by things that no one saw coming. This is obvious when considering that, 100 years ago, Bitcoin and day traders flexing their non-liquidated money did not exist, and neither did Dubai’s influencers, who live extreme lives doing crazy things we “average joes” could never even dream of affording.
Now that we know that the definition of “normal” can’t mean the same thing everyday, let’s go over what it means today, and most likely will mean for at least the next five years. Keep in mind this is what I, as a teenager, am fed by the news and social media.
To be normal is to be the majority of these things: to work a job that you don’t particularly love, if not outright despise, just to keep the bills paid. It means sitting in traffic on the way to and from an office that feels more like a holding cell than a space for creativity. It means sitting under fluorescent lights in a cubicle, punching keys, staring at a computer, and answering emails in a job that feels totally disconnected from what you truly want to be doing with your life.
It’s living paycheck to paycheck and having six different subscriptions for television and other things that make life seem just a little more bearable.
It’s planning for vacations that you rarely take, promising yourself every Monday that this will be the week you finally start chasing your dreams, only to be crushed down by deadlines, burnout, or sheer exhaustion by Friday. It’s telling yourself “someday” while that day just constantly slips further and further away from your grasp.
Normal is also being constantly bombarded by a consumerist culture that sells you the idea that happiness is just one more purchase away. It’s scrolling through social media during your lunch break, comparing your life to those who seem to have "figured it out." It’s wondering why you’re not as happy, successful, or fulfilled as everyone else seems to be, all while carrying the silent knowledge that this “normal” is shared by countless others around you. You’re nothing special.
To be normal is to be part of a system that thrives on your complacency. It’s staying stuck because breaking free feels too risky, too uncertain, or too scary. It’s being told to work hard, go to college, and follow the rules, only to find that the promised rewards don’t match the effort you had to put in to get there. It’s living a life where security often comes at the expense of excitement, and where the pursuit of "more"—more money, more status, more approval—comes at the cost of your authenticity and happiness.
But perhaps the most insidious part of being normal is the way it’s normalized. The sense that this is just how life is supposed to be. That trading your passions for practicality and your time for a paycheck is not only inevitable but noble. That you should be grateful for such a stable job and life, even if it drains that very same life right out of you. That you should keep your head down, work hard, and be content with what you have, even if deep down, you yearn for something more—something else. Something that you’ve always wanted to do, but can’t quite because of your situation.
This is what I believe it means to be normal today. Whether or not this is true, well, nobody can really say, right? I know many people who love their 9-5s and enjoy and tolerate that kind of lifestyle, but I also know even more people who absolutely despise their 9-5s and complain about the exact issues that I have outlined above! So who knows? What do you guys think? Is this the kind of “normal” you want to accept, or is it time for us dreamers to try and imagine something different?
Signing off, Daniel.
PS - IF and only if you are interested in philosophy, tech, and honestly whatever, and just want to have fun discussions and what not, literally just for fun, whenever you want, then consider joining this discord server.
You definitely don’t have to, but it could be just a fun way for people to talk to each other about various issues so we can all come to a better understanding of the world around us (I will participate of course, so if you want to talk to me personally, that’s the best way to get in touch!).
Here’s the link: https://discord.gg/44FBCjNe
